1. Jake would be my 3rd husband. My first one would be dead from a tragic accident like careening over a cliff in a car with sabotoged brakes and my second and I would be divorced and fighting over rental property on "the docks".
2. James would have a longer, fancier, name like Jamison or James Matthew Beauford something or other the III.
3. I would live at "The Mansion".
4. I would have a wacky cook/maid/butler named Sabrina.
5. My wardrobe would be comprised of oversized, tacky, jewelry and many, flowing, dresses that I'd wear just around the house.
6. If I wanted to go anywhere, I'd ask Sabrina to tell my driver to pull the Bentley around.
7. In my living room, there'd always be a tray that had glasses and a full pitcher of water or orange juice.
8. Whenever I ate out at a restaurant there'd be a huge scene as I got into a fight with one of Jake's ex-wives, or my ex-husband. Inevitably someone would have a drink thrown in their face and I'd have to be dragged out.
9. I'd have several long, lost siblings & half siblings who suddenly have come forward. Offspring of affairs my mother and father each had, "years ago" & pregnancies that no one knew about.
10. James would stay a baby forever, whisked away and cared for by our nanny, and then one day appear grown up and 10.
11. I would have experienced and overcome many tragic events like being trapped in the basement of a burning house, stuck in an elevator with my arch enemy after a building explosion, a terrible car crash that left me in a coma for weeks, and a near drowning while trying to save my ex-husband's sister because I am a good person even though he doesn't think so. But I survive!
12. I would wake up in the morning everyday with perfect make-up & hair. And never have morning breath either.
13. Everytime Jake and I made love, (in front of a fireplace) there would be a hundred candles lit everywhere and rose petals all over our floor and bed.